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Exploring the Pros and Cons of Social Media on Mental Health
Recently I had a client say to me, “I need to quit Tiktok!” We both chuckled because we knew how real that request was. I was able to validate her about the addictive nature of this particular platform, and many social media platforms for that matter.
As a licensed clinical social worker, I often find myself engaging with clients who grapple with the impact of social media on their mental well-being. Social media platforms have become an integral part of our lives, connecting us with friends, family, and a vast online community. However, it is crucial to recognize that social media comes with both advantages and disadvantages when it comes to our mental health. In this blog, we will delve into the pros and cons of social media and its influence on our mental well-being.
The Pros
- Connection and Support: Social media offers a powerful means of connecting with others, especially for individuals who may feel isolated or have limited social interactions in their daily lives. It allows people to find like-minded communities, share experiences, and seek support from individuals who understand their challenges. This sense of belonging can be immensely beneficial for mental health.
- Awareness and Education: Social media platforms serve as platforms for raising awareness about mental health issues, reducing stigma, and promoting resources and information. They facilitate conversations that help individuals understand and empathize with diverse mental health experiences, fostering a more inclusive and supportive society. Despite there being a ton more information it’s important that you are receiving your information from a credible source.
- Online Therapy and Support: Many mental health professionals provide therapy and support services through online platforms, making mental health care more accessible and convenient. Social media can serve as a bridge between clients and therapists, allowing individuals to access guidance and assistance from the comfort of their homes.
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The Cons
- Social Comparison and Self-Esteem: One of the downsides of social media is the tendency for individuals to compare themselves with others, often leading to feelings of inadequacy, envy, and low self-esteem. Seeing carefully curated highlight reels of others’ lives can create unrealistic expectations and contribute to negative self-perception.
- Cyberbullying and Online Harassment: The anonymity and distance afforded by social media can unfortunately foster a breeding ground for cyberbullying and online harassment. Such experiences can have severe psychological consequences, causing anxiety, depression, and even suicidal ideation. It is essential to be mindful of this dark side of social media and take steps to combat it.
- Fear of Missing Out (FOMO) and Anxiety: Constant exposure to others’ seemingly exciting lives and social events on social media can trigger a fear of missing out (FOMO). This fear can lead to anxiety and a sense of inadequacy, further impacting mental well-being. It is crucial to remember that what we see on social media is often a curated representation of reality.
Here are 5 ways to limit your social media usage:
Set a time limit: Decide how much time you want to spend on social media each day and stick to it. You can use apps that help you track your usage and remind you when you’ve reached your limit.
Turn off notifications: Notifications can be distracting and make it difficult to focus on other tasks. Try turning off notifications for social media apps to reduce the temptation to check them.
Create a schedule: Instead of checking social media whenever you feel like it, create a schedule for when you’ll use it. This can help you be more intentional and mindful about your usage.
Take a break: Sometimes the best way to limit social media usage is to take a break altogether. Consider a social media detox for a few days or even a week to reset and refocus your attention on other things. You can make this a part of your self care routine in which you have breaks on a weekly, biweekly or even monthly basis.
Find a new hobby or activity: In order to stop one habit sometimes you have to replace that habit or behavior with something new. The same applies with reducing your social media usage. You’d need to find alternative activities to fill your time, such as reading, exercising, or spending time with friends and family.
Conclusion:
Social media has revolutionized the way we connect and interact with others, bringing both positive and negative impacts on our mental health. It is vital to approach social media usage mindfully and recognize its potential benefits and pitfalls. Striking a balance between engagement with the virtual world and self-care in the present moment is key. Setting boundaries, practicing digital detoxes, and cultivating self-compassion are essential steps towards maintaining a healthy relationship with social media and safeguarding our mental well-being in the digital age. Remember, you have the power to shape your social media experience to support your mental health journey.
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Achieving Work-Life Balance in the Summer Season!
Memorial Day has passed …and summer is here! Well, not officially, but unofficially we can say summer is in the air. The summer months bring warmth, sunshine, and the promise of relaxation. However, for many individuals, managing work-life responsibilities during this time can be challenging. Thinking about child care for the summer months, wanting to be outside more despite having to clock-in for work, coordinating the next cookout, beach visit or weekend getaway can be tedious.
Fundamentally, I understand the importance of achieving a healthy balance between work and personal life. In this blog post, we will explore effective strategies for navigating the summer season while maintaining a sense of harmony and well-being.
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Here are some ways to start creating more work-life balance (or harmony):
1. Prioritize Self-Care
First, it would be good to start with self-care. Amidst busy work schedules and family commitments, it is crucial to prioritize self-care into your daily routine. Dedicate time each day to engage in activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul. Whether it’s taking a walk in nature, practicing mindfulness, or enjoying a hobby, make self-care a non-negotiable part of your routine.
2. Set Boundaries
Next, you can focus on establishing clear boundaries between work and personal life is essential for maintaining balance. Communicate your availability and limits to colleagues, supervisors, and loved ones. Create dedicated periods for work and leisure, allowing yourself the freedom to fully engage in both domains without unnecessary overlap or distractions.
3. Plan and Organize
Once you’ve established healthy boundaries then you can effective plan and organize to manage your competing demands. Create a schedule that accommodates work responsibilities, family commitments, and recreational activities. Prioritize tasks, set realistic goals, and allocate time for relaxation. By structuring your time effectively, you can enhance productivity and reduce stress. You can also plan to use your vacation time to spend time alone or with loved ones to prioritize rest.
4. Delegate and Seek Support
Moreover, as you start to plan and organize your schedule and responsibilities you’ll realize not all these task need to be yours. Recognize that you don’t have to tackle everything on your own. Delegate tasks at work and home whenever possible. Reach out to family members, friends, or trusted professionals to assist with childcare, household chores, or other responsibilities. Building a support network can alleviate stress and create opportunities for shared experiences during the summer months.
5. Embrace Flexibility
Ultimately, the goal is feel like your schedule and responsibilities are doable. Summer often presents unique opportunities for leisure and recreation. Embrace the flexibility of the season by incorporating activities that bring you joy. Whether it’s planning a family outing, taking a vacation, or engaging in outdoor hobbies, allow yourself to fully embrace the spirit of summer and enjoy the benefits of a well-deserved break.
6. Practice Mindfulness
Lastly, amidst the busyness of work and family life, practicing mindfulness can help anchor you in the present moment. Take a few minutes each day to engage in mindfulness exercises such as deep breathing, meditation, or gratitude journaling. Cultivating mindfulness can enhance your overall well-being and enable you to approach challenges with clarity and calmness.
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Conclusion
In conclusion, balancing work-life responsibilities during the summer months is a worthwhile endeavor for your overall well-being. By prioritizing self-care, setting boundaries, planning, delegating, embracing flexibility, and practicing mindfulness, you can create a harmonious and fulfilling summer season. Remember, achieving work-life balance is an ongoing process that requires conscious effort and self-awareness. Dr. Dalton Smith goes as far as to call it work-life integration, in which we need to incorporate rest as a priority into our routine. So, embrace the summer with intention, and may it bring you joy, rejuvenation, and a renewed sense of restoration in all aspects of your life.
How will you incorporate work-life harmony in your life this summer? Comment below.
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Strategies for Managing the Loss of a Loved One
In the past 15 years or so I’ve had about 4 truly significant deaths in my family (or those I would consider like family). Every time I’ve experienced the loss of a loved one I’m grappled with questions like why them, why now, and why this way. I recognize that to some degree I will probably never get those questions answered, so in some way I have to find solace with their passing. Yet regardless of your belief system – the afterlife, heaven or reincarnation – accepting that you won’t be able to engage with your loved ones as you once knew them is difficult. So dealing with that sense of grief can be challenging.
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Grief is a natural response to loss and can take a toll on both our physical and mental well-being. Grief and loss can have a significant impact on mental health. The process of grieving can bring about intense emotions such as sadness, anger, and guilt. These emotions can lead to feelings of anxiety, depression, and even post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It is important to acknowledge the pain of grief and seek support from loved ones or a mental health professional. Coping strategies such as self-care, exercise, and therapy can help individuals navigate the difficult journey of grief and promote overall mental wellness.
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Here are some coping skills that may help:
- Acknowledge and accept your feelings: It’s important to express your emotions and not bottle them up. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or overwhelmed. Allow yourself to feel and express your emotions. This can include talking to someone, writing in a journal, or engaging in creative expression like art or music.
- Take care of yourself: Grief can take a toll on physical and emotional health, so it’s important to prioritize self-care. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, exercising, and eating well. Self-care is crucial during this time.
- Reach out for support: Grief can be isolating, but it’s important to remember that you’re not alone. Talk to friends, family, or a professional counselor about your feelings and memories of your loved one. You don’t have to go through this alone.
- Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness can help individuals stay present in the moment and manage overwhelming emotions. Try to stay present at the moment and focus on your breathing. This can help you feel more grounded and calm.
- Engage in activities you enjoy: Doing things you love, like reading, painting, or listening to music, can help distract you from your grief.
- Stay sober: Using alcohol or drugs during this confusing time is not a good idea. It can only make the process more difficult.
- Seek out a support group: Joining a group of people who are also grieving can provide a sense of community and understanding.
Remember, grief is a process and there is no “right” way to grieve. Remember that healing takes time. Be patient and kind to yourself, and remember that it’s okay to ask for help when needed. Give yourself grace and seek out the support you need.
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Nurturing Your Mind, Body, and Soul Through Journaling
I believe when most of us hear the word “diary” or “journal” we think about an emotional preteen/teen girl venting about her feelings and experiences in a book she keeps hidden from the rest of the world. As we’ve gotten older we now know that journals aren’t only for preteen girls. I hear some of my clients say “I don’t know where to start” or “I don’t know what to write in a journal”.
To give some context, journaling is an effective method for self-reflection, personal development, and stress release. Writing down your thoughts, emotions, and experiences can help you achieve clarity, process unpleasant emotions, and get a deeper understanding of yourself. In this blog post, we’ll look at the advantages of journaling and offer some advice on how to get started.
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The Advantages of Journaling
Here are 5 specific ways journaling can be beneficial to you and your mental health:
- Reduces Anxiety and Stress
Writing about traumatic or stressful events has been found in studies to improve mental and physical health by reducing symptoms of anxiety and sadness, that you’re holding both in your mind and body. It can help you reduce tension and release pent-up feelings.
- Improves Self-Awareness
It can help you connect with your thoughts and feelings, which can lead to greater self-awareness. You can have a better understanding of your emotions, reactions, and behavioral patterns by writing down your experiences. This insight can assist you in making beneficial life adjustments.
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- Enhances Creativity
Journaling can be an excellent method to express yourself creatively. Writing might help you generate fresh ideas and explore various points of view. While journaling you can try to focus less on “perfection” and let your thoughts and voice flow freely.
- Memory and cognitive function are improved.
It has been shown to boost memory and cognitive performance. Remembering crucial details, events, and ideas can be improved by writing down your thoughts and experiences. It can also improve cognitive function and mental agility by stimulating the brain.
- Helps Process Difficult Emotions
Being about to write out your thoughts can be a useful method for dealing with tough emotions. You can acquire perspective and clarity by writing down your ideas and feelings. This might assist you in working through difficult feelings and moving forward.
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Journal Prompts & Affirmation Workbook | Mindfulness Workbook | Printable Journal | Journal Prompts| Digital Workbook | Reflection Prompt$10.00 -
Goal Setting Workbook | Self Care Journal | Step-by-Step Goal Setting Guide | Personal Growth Workbook | Mental Health | Self Care Planner$10.00 -
Guide to Managing Anxiety and Worry Workbook |Mental and Emotional Health Workbook |Therapy Worksheet |Inner Healing Selflove Digital Journal$8.00
Getting Started with Journaling
So now that we know some of the benefits of journaling, let’s list how to get started on your journaling journey.
- Select a Journal
The first step in writing is to select a journal that feels welcoming and comfortable. A regular notebook, a digital journaling app, or a bullet journal with customizable layouts are all options.
- Set aside time
Next, establish a daily routine for writing in your journal. It could be first thing in the morning, over your lunch break, or right before you go to bed. Make it a regular part of your schedule, whichever time you choose.
- Write Freely
Allow yourself to write freely and without judgment when you sit down to write. Don’t be concerned about grammar or spelling. Allow your thoughts to pour onto the page.
- Experiment with Different Approaches
Experiment with several journaling strategies to see which ones work best for you. You may try writing in a stream-of-consciousness style, following prompts, or delving into certain themes or topics.
- Reflect and Revisit
Review your journal entries on a regular basis to reflect on your progress and get fresh insights. You may discover trends in your thoughts or habits, places where you’ve evolved or improved, or repeated topics in your writing
Takeaway
Try to create a journaling routine! It’s an effective technique for processing your emotions and building on self-awareness. It can give you a safe and productive channel for self-expression, whether you’re wanting to alleviate stress, tap into your creativity, or process challenging emotions. You’ll be able to obtain fresh insights, improve your mental and emotional well-being, and develop your understanding of yourself by making writing a regular part of your routine.
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Sources:
Pennebaker, J. W. (2017) Expressive Writing in Psychological Science. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/1745691617707315
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Journal Prompts & Affirmation Workbook | Mindfulness Workbook | Printable Journal | Journal Prompts| Digital Workbook | Reflection Prompt$10.00
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Goal Setting Workbook | Self Care Journal | Step-by-Step Goal Setting Guide | Personal Growth Workbook | Mental Health | Self Care Planner$10.00
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Guide to Managing Anxiety and Worry Workbook |Mental and Emotional Health Workbook |Therapy Worksheet |Inner Healing Selflove Digital Journal$8.00
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Resilience Workbook | Build Resilience Coach Workbook | Mental Health Workbook | Emotional Health Workbook | Guided Journal$8.00
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How Spring Cleaning Impacts Mental Health
Spring is in the air! As we start to get through the long dark nights, gloomy cold weather of winter – some of the symptoms of seasonal depression (seasonal affective disorder) starts to lift – it’s always a pleasant feeling to know it comes to an end. To see the trees grow their leaves, the grass starts to flourish again, birds are chirping and flowers start to bloom it feels refreshing. And this time of year is primetime to start refreshing your home.
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BENEFITS OF CLEANING, DECLUTTERING AND ORGANIZING
Improved Your Mental Health
Spring cleaning isn’t just about decluttering your physical space, it can also have a positive impact on your mental health. Clearing out your living area can reduce feelings of stress and anxiety. It can also improve sleep quality and increase productivity by creating a more organized environment for you to work, think or be in.
Sense of Control of Your Surrounding
Sometimes when we feel stressed and anxious, we feel like our lives are out of control. Cleaning or organizing your space can give you a sense of control over your surroundings. We all know that clutter can really be distracting and make it hard to focus on a particular
Cleaning Benefits Your Physical Health
Beyond the benefits of a clean and organized living space, the act of cleaning itself can be meditative and serve as a form of self-care. Engaging in physical activity, like mopping the floors or organizing furniture, can release endorphins and boost your mood. Plus, the satisfaction of completing a cleaning task can boost your confidence and provide a sense of accomplishment.
Opportunity for You to Practice Mindfulness
Spring cleaning can also be an opportunity to practice mindfulness. Instead of rushing through the process, take time to appreciate the present moment and the small details of your home. Engage all of your senses as you clean and pay attention to the sights, sounds, and smells around you.
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WAYS TO START CLEANING, DECLUTTERING, AND ORGANIZING
Organizing and decluttering can be customized to your preferences. It’s important not to burden yourself by attempting to tackle everything all at once. A thorough deep cleaning isn’t necessary.
Here are 8 ways you can start decluttering and organizing your space today:
- Sorting through paperwork and shredding documents that are no longer needed
- Sorting through your closet and donating clothes you no longer wear
- Going through your bookshelf and donating books you no longer read or need
- Organizing your desk drawers and discarding any unnecessary items
- Cleaning out your refrigerator and discarding expired food items
- Sorting through your makeup and discarding any expired or unused products
- Organizing your shoe collection and donating shoes that no longer fit or are worn out.
- Clearing out your pantry and organizing your food items by category
Comment below some other ways you can start small and declutter a space in your home.
Finally, don’t forget to take care of yourself while you clean. Stay hydrated, take breaks when needed, and listen to music or a podcast to make the experience more enjoyable. And remember, it’s okay to ask for help or hire a professional if needed.
Overall, cleaning, decluttering, and organizing can be a powerful tool for improving your mental health and well-being. So, take advantage of the season and give your home and mind a refreshing start.
7 responses to “How Spring Cleaning Impacts Mental Health”
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Yes I love this! I’m in spring cleaning mode right now and it’s a whole mental cleansing just as much as the house. I’m having major clutter anxiety lately.
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Thanks for sharing Jaz! Happy to hear you found it useful. Be well 💜
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It’s def that time of year in my house – clearing out things and getting ready fpr a garage sale. Great tips! Sometimes it seems like it will never get all done.
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Oh, a garbage sale sounds like a great idea. Happy to hear you found the tips useful 🙃
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This is so true. Purging and organizing is on my spring to-do list!
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Happy to hear it Laurie! Hope it goes well 💜
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[…] Decluttering can be overwhelming, especially for busy families. Start small by tackling one area for a specific time and donating or selling no-longer-needed items. Consider enlisting the help of a professional organizer if needed. […]
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Sources:
Anxiety and Depression Association of America. Physical activity reduces stress.
Hanley AW, Warner AR, Dehili VM, Canto AI, Garland EL. Washing dishes to wash the dishes: brief instruction in an informal mindfulness practice. Mindfulness. 2015;6(5):1095-1103. doi:10.1007/s12671-014-0360-9
Saxbe DE, Repetti R. No place like home: home tours correlate with daily patterns of mood and cortisol. Pers Soc Psychol Bull. 2010 Jan;36(1):71-81. doi:10.1177/0146167209352864. PMID: 19934011.
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The Value of Self-Love in Black History: Promoting Empowerment and Self-Care.
“Even if it makes others uncomfortable, I will love who I am.” – Janelle Monáe
Self-love is a process of recognizing one’s own potential and worth, and accepting oneself fully, flaws and all. It is about taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional needs, as well as accepting and embracing who you are. It’s more than just treating yourself kindly or thinking positively; it’s about feeling empowered by your own unique individual strengths and qualities.
Self-love is an integral part of Black history. Throughout the centuries, the African diaspora have had to navigate the world and face extreme adversity, yet have still held fast to the importance of self-care, self-reflection and self-appreciation. From Frederick Douglass to Paul Robeson to Audre Lorde, Black folks have vocally proclaimed their right to love themselves in the face of systemic oppression, inspiring generations to come. Self-love and self-affirmation are essential components of Black history, and serve as a reminder that our liberation comes through bolstering ourselves and one another.
Although self-love can be difficult to maintain, especially if you’re going through a challenging or oppressive time, it is important to remember that it is a process that takes time and effort.
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Here are some tips to help you develop a healthy practice of self-love:
1. Accept your flaws – We all have things about ourselves that we would like to change or improve, but it’s important to remind yourself that these flaws don’t define you. Instead, focus on the positive aspects of yourself and your life.
2. Say nice things to yourself – Practicing positive affirmations can help you start to think better of yourself. Make sure to focus on the things that you like about yourself, even if they are small, rather than pointing out all of the things you wish were different.
3. Praise your successes – Don’t be afraid to recognize and acknowledge your accomplishments, big or small. This will help build up your self-confidence, which is an essential part of self-love.
4. Prioritize “me time” – Taking care of yourself and engaging in activities you enjoy can help you stay connected to who you are as a person and boost your self-esteem. Whether it’s reading a book, taking a walk, or watching your favorite movie, make sure to take some time each day or week to do something just for you.
5. Find a support system – Developing relationships with people who support and accept you can be an invaluable resource for learning how to love yourself. Reach out to family, friends, colleagues, or even a therapist if needed, who can provide guidance and understanding during times when self-love may seem hard to come by.
Self-love is fundamental for overall well-being, so make sure to take the steps necessary to cultivate it in your life above all else. With patience and practice, you can learn to appreciate the qualities that make you unique and accept yourself for who you are.
As someone that identifies as a Black person, we have always had to find ways to love and accept ourselves despite pervasive external forces that have sought to tear us down. From generational trauma to racial discrimination and oppression, Black people have had to continually fight for respect and recognition as equals, while also maintaining a strong sense of self-love. This has been especially difficult throughout the decades, as societal norms have favored those who fit into certain physical and cultural standards. Even in the struggle for freedom and human rights, we must recognize how important it is to love ourselves. Self-love allows us to stay grounded in our own worth, and to serve as a source of empowerment for each other. It helps us to not only build our resilience but also effectively fight for justice. As we continue to honor our long history of Black excellence, let’s also remember to practice self-love.
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Embracing Yourself: A Journey of Self-Love
The great thing about the current encouragement and promotion of self-love is that it inspires people to improve and become conscious about their lives. People engage in self-care practices such as taking days off, beauty routines, or making time for hobbies. These practices are helpful, but to have true self love we must work internally. We have to challenge the beliefs and limitations we hold inside.
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Don’t let other people and their expectations consume you. Time spent healing, growing, and allowing yourself to simply exist is not time wasted. You are not “behind” in life or less of value because you are not where you want to be. How people treat you is not indicative of your worth.
Allow yourself to have standards and values that suit you. You don’t have to wait until you look a certain way or have certain things. Never diminish your personal standards, for when you encounter someone or something that meets your standards and it for some reason doesn’t work out you can walk away knowing that:
- You are worthy of what you want regardless of circumstances
- You have moments and memories that fulfilled your standards at the time to hold onto
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To have true self love we have to forgive ourselves, treat ourselves with respect, change the attitude we have towards life, and change the negative opinions we hold against ourselves. One of the most important relationships we will have in our lifetime is the one we have with ourselves.
Affirmations to remember:
I believe in my capabilities
I am proud of myself for getting this far
I am grateful for what I have, and I won’t dwell on what I don’t have
I attract abundance and prosperity
I am allowed to take up space and exist
I am worthy of genuine love and support
I deserve to feel safe and to be safe
Valentine’s Day is a holiday that symbolizes love and romance between loved ones. Share and show love with your friends, family, or partner(s). Most importantly, make sure to treat yourself the way you would want to be treated. If anything, self-love is an opportunity to show yourself kindness, compassion, and appreciation.“Self-love is a process. It will require time. It will require patience. It will require change, solitude, pain, and everything that isn’t much pretty in this life. But in the end, it will be worth it. It will be beautiful. It will be you.” —Juansen Dizon
You are worthy of love and deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. Remember to prioritize self-love and acceptance, as it is the foundation for a fulfilling and happy life. Embrace your unique qualities and talents, and never forget your worth!
Happy Valentine’s Day!About the Writer…
Jamaica Okech is a current Masters student studying Social Work at the University of Texas at Arlington. As a native Texan and member of the Black community she has a passion for finding ways to reduce harm in the lives of those in need. Jamaica is inspired to be in the mental health/counseling field due to the gaps she has witnessed in the treatment of historically marginalized communities.
As an aspiring clinician, Jamaica believes in the importance of therapy as a helpful tool to support individuals in their healing and self discovery journeys. In her therapeutic approach, she provides an unbiased safe space for her client to grow at their own pace. She provides support by prioritizing their wellness through trauma informed care, empowerment, and personalized treatment.
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Why is self-compassion considered important?
Each year, whether nearing the end of it or at the very beginning, we are encouraged to look at our past and consider what we want the new year to bring. We analyze our potential in hopes that we make the new year better than the last. In this process we need to apply self-compassion because it is important to understand that we can always start again.
Self compassion is allowing yourself to feel understanding and kindness towards yourself, despite your failures, disappointments, imperfections and shortcomings.
Being able to remind yourself that it’s okay to change and/or start over. There is no limit to how many times we can try and work towards our goals. Sometimes we tend to place pressure on ourselves to excel at every new habit, routine, or goal we try to make.
This pressure may be more of a hindrance to progress than we anticipate. Some tasks or skills will take practice and patience. Growing up my parents refused to say the common phrase “Practice makes perfect.” Instead, we would say “Practice makes better.” Rather than trying to achieve perfection we can work towards being better.
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The amount of consistency and effort we contribute to something will achieve a better result. This year you may struggle to find purpose or passion, feel exhausted, and need a break. When these feelings arise, know that your potential won’t be wasted and taking care of yourself should be prioritized no matter what. Set aside time for breaks so you can listen to the needs of your body and your mind. A part of living life is deciding how we want to live it. Take your time and don’t conform to anyone’s definition of success. You can define what success means to you. Believe
that you have the capabilities to achieve what you desire and remember to be kind and understanding towards yourself.“Self-compassion is an act of the will, a choice to be kind and understanding when faced with personal failings.”
–Kristin Neff
Dr. Kristin Neff is an expert and leader in the study, understanding, and definition of self- compassion.
Dr. Neff defined self-compassion in three elements:- Self-kindness vs Self-judgment — Understanding that we will inevitably experience failure and life difficulties but treating ourselves with gentleness is a way to accept it rather than self-criticism or ignoring our pain.
- Common humanity vs Isolation — Recognizing that suffering and inadequacy is a human experience that we all share. The common phrase “you are not alone” comes to mind here. You are not the only one that will make mistakes and our mistakes and failures can connect us just as much as our successes.
- Mindfulness vs Over identification — Be mindful of negative emotions and thoughts. Don’t ignore your pain but also don’t be consumed by it. Remember that self-compassion is not to be confused with self-pity, self-indulgence, or self-esteem. Practice compassion towards yourself.
There are many ways to practice self-compassion. Some ways are to practice positive self-talk, exploring through writing, or creating healthier habits. Find an exercise that suits you and try to maintain it in this new year.
Have a wonderful New Year!
About the Writer…
Jamaica Okech is a current Masters student studying Social Work at the University of Texas at Arlington. As a native Texan and member of the Black community she has a passion for finding ways to reduce harm in the lives of those in need. Jamaica is inspired to be in the mental health/counseling field due to the gaps she has witnessed in the treatment of historically marginalized communities.
As an aspiring clinician, Jamaica believes in the importance of therapy as a helpful tool to support individuals in their healing and self discovery journeys. In her therapeutic approach, she provides an unbiased safe space for her client to grow at their own pace. She provides support by prioritizing their wellness through trauma informed care, empowerment, and personalized treatment.
Mindfully Restored, LLC provides client-centered, trauma-informed services and products that will allow women to achieve new levels of resilience, healing, and life satisfaction. To learn more about our services, schedule a FREE consultation.
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Achieving Your Goals: Setting & Reaching Your Goals for Success
It’s that time of year again where we’re setting New Years’ resolutions, goal setting, setting intentions and turning a new leaf. While it’s admirable to have the desire to change things around for the new year it’s important to be mindful of how and why you make that change. Changing habits and routines may be difficult, but it’s encouraged to work towards desired outcomes on a regular basis, and the start of a New Year is a great time to do so. However, you don’t have to wait until the new year. If you have the right tools you can start to work on your goals at any time.
How many times over the years have we set goals and expectations and never really achieved them?
Here are some reasons we don’t achieve our goals:
- Our goals are too big.
- Our goals are based on society’s expectation of you.
- We aren’t actually interested or invested in the goal.
- Our goals are based on others’ goals or accomplishments.
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The key to success in any endeavor is setting meaningful, attainable goals. Goals give us something to strive for and help us stay focused on our vision. They help us stay on track and remind us of our desired outcome.
Here are some tips and strategies to create and achieve your goals for the year:
- Set realistic goals that are achievable and measurable. Don’t set goals that are too lofty or unrealistic, as they can be difficult to reach and lead to feelings of discouragement. Having accountability with others helps to keep goals achievable as well.
- Break down large goals into smaller ones. This makes it easier to stay on track and keep progressing towards your goal. Checking on your progress regularly help to keep it active.
- Make sure to celebrate your progress. Achieving small goals is just as important as reaching your larger goal, so make sure to recognize your successes along the way.
- Stay focused and motivated. Don’t get discouraged if you don’t reach your goal right away. Persevere and stay focused on your goal and you’ll eventually get there.
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This workbook will help you create action plans for your success. Creating S.M.A.R.T. long-term and short-term goals will help you to reach your desired goals.
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Setting new goals and creating new routines and habits can be scary. So it’s also very important to be mindful how we talk to ourselves as we work towards our desired outcome. Practicing daily positive affirmations is important to attaining our goals. Not letting fearful or unhelpful thoughts overcome your mental space is going to be something you work through on a regular basis. However, with the right supportive circle, determination and persistence you can achieve anything you put your mind to.
“I am lucky that whatever fear I have inside me, my desire to win is always stronger”
Serena Williams, Professional Tennis PlayerTakeaway
A fresh start is a powerful thing! The new year brings a new opportunity to define your goals for your personal life and your business. Take some time this week to consider where you’d like to see yourself in the next 3 months, and write out your goals. Make sure your goal is S.M.A.R.T. Remember to think about why you are making this goal your goal.
Comment below one of your goals for the new year.
2 responses to “Achieving Your Goals: Setting & Reaching Your Goals for Success”
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This is helpful and aligns with my own thinking! I need to celebrate my success more! 🙂
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Yes! Celebrate those wins Laurie, you deserve it 💜
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Managing Anxiety During the Holidays
The holiday season is often accompanied with stress and pressure. There are responsibilities that involve plans with loved ones, shopping, cleaning, and entertaining on top of maintaining your usual routine. Holiday anxiety happens commonly, and it can pose a mental health issue if left unchecked.
“The holidays are a wonderful time, but they can quickly become overwhelming if you neglect to plan ahead.”
– Dr. Daisy Sutherland
signs of anxiety during the holiday season
Some of the following symptoms could have existed before the holiday season, but the holiday season has heightened the following signs.
- Excessive worries that won’t go away
- Physical anxiety symptoms (rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, sweating, upset stomach, etc.)
- Social isolation or withdrawal
- Panic attacks
- Trouble sleeping or insomnia
- Feeling hopeless and helpless when under distress
- Change in appearance regarding less attention to self-care or hygiene
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It is important to have healthy holiday boundaries if you know you are someone who often experiences holiday anxiety. The following tips are a guide to healthy holiday boundaries that you may try to establish this season.
Guide to Healthy Holiday Boundaries
- Be Empowered to Skip. Go Late. Leave Early or Drive Your Own Car to Holiday Parties
- Ask For What You Want or Need
- Say “No” Without Guilt
- Say “Yes” Because You Want To, Not Out of Obligation or To Please Others
- Let Go of Trying to Control What Other People Eat, Drink, Wear, Say, or Do
- Express Your Feelings in An Assertive And Respectful Way; Avoid Passive-Aggressive Behavior
- Take Care of Your Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual Needs
- Spend Time with Supportive People
- Take Responsibility for Your Own Happiness and Don’t Be a Martyr
- Don’t Make Excuses for Yourself or Anyone Else
- Act According to Your Own Values and Beliefs
Takeaway message…
Take space for yourself during this holiday season. Your needs matter and there will be circumstances or changes that happen that are out of your control. Try to focus on what you can control instead of what you can’t this holiday season.
Happy Holidays and I hope all of you have a Happy New Year!
About the Writer…
Jamaica Okech is a current Masters student studying Social Work at the University of Texas at Arlington. As a native Texan and member of the Black community she has a passion for finding ways to reduce harm in the lives of those in need. Jamaica is inspired to be in the mental health/counseling field due to the gaps she has witnessed in the treatment of historically marginalized communities.
As an aspiring clinician, Jamaica believes in the importance of therapy as a helpful tool to support individuals in their healing and self discovery journeys. In her therapeutic approach, she provides an unbiased safe space for her client to grow at their own pace. She provides support by prioritizing their wellness through trauma informed care, empowerment, and personalized treatment.
Mindfully Restored, LLC provides client-centered, trauma-informed services and products that will allow women to achieve new levels of resilience, healing, and life satisfaction. To learn more about our services, schedule a FREE consultation.
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